I couldn't be bothered to write anything of substance today
Referrer logs are fun. You get to see some of the strange places people are following links from to get to your ramblings. Google links are especially fun. For instance, people googling “porkbarrel” see that my rant on the politics of GTA comes in at around number 10. So even though it's probably completely irrelevant to what most people would be searching for, it gets a lot of hits. (welcome PoliSci majors!)
One Google search that keeps leading people to this post is “Richard Bartle spinning in his grave.” I am amused and appalled that not only do I have the distinction of being number 1 on that search, but that people are actually searching on the term. I'm just biding my time until the old geezer actually does drop dead to kick off my ad-words campaign. Cha-ching.
This morning my referrer log showed some hits from Google, on the search term “large ladybug pinata.” Google lists my twisted little curse-fest at number 5 on that search. I have this great image in my head of some soccer mom and her cute little girl (let's call her Brittany) eagerly planning Brittany's little ladybug pinata birthday party, doing a little internet research, and ooh, what's this? Why, someone else who loves ladybugs! As they read together, a look of horror crosses little Brittany's face as it slowly dawns on her that dear god they are going to kill my pinata just like they killed Amber's!
Don't let them do it Brittany. Grab Ladybug and run. Ruuuun! If you've ever read Born Free, you know what to do. If you've ever read Where the Red Fern Grows…um…don't do that.
It does my heart good to know that I've quite possibly saved the life of even a single large ladybug pinata, even if I had to inadvertently poison Google's cache to do it. Did I mention ladybug pinata birthday party for little girls with associated napkins, paper plates, cake, and catering for all occasions? Okay, that was an intentional cache poisoning. I have no shame.
April 11th, 2006 at 11:48 am
You do understand you rank #1 for 'Butterfly Humping' Correct?
Your Welcome.
I am sure it is highly trafficked.
April 11th, 2006 at 11:56 am
This is the most fantastic site EVER to find information on mesophelioma. You know, mesophelioma, is a terrible disease and only by going to Amber Night can you find out what to do about it.
(Quick, get that ad-words campaign up. No thanks necessary, I like helping out. Just don't let the cash go to your head.)
=)
April 11th, 2006 at 4:25 pm
If you've ever read Where the Red Fern Grows…um…don't do that.
But why? It's a story of friendship and…ohhhhhhhh! Yeah, don't do that.
Now I'm gonna go have a cry. Thanks Amber.
Dave (someone stole my cool internet name)
April 12th, 2006 at 10:27 am
Cyanbane: Haha, you owe me a new keyboard.
Ken: Inspired by your comments, I also plan on a series of posts discussing cialis and erectile disfunction. Non-prescription and over-the-counter cialis.
Dave: You're welcome. Turn on Lifetime while you're at it, I find it helps to really get those tears moving.
April 13th, 2006 at 1:14 am
I have to admit, I'm the bad man: I laughed at the ladybug story.
Anyway, I usually don't get weird linking on my own blog. The best I've gotten is I'm #5 for “elephant fuckers” on Google. My own fault, I posted about it after I found that search term in my referrer logs one time. It's an evil self-perpetuating cycle! Now, I share this gift with Amber.
April 13th, 2006 at 10:36 pm
Still very much alive, thank you. I will have my estate contact you if the situation should change.