Minus 50 You-know-what, Kotaku
Where, oh where, have the smart people gone?
I just need to know one thing. Who at Kotaku decided this was interview-worthy?
Allow me to me be pristinely translucent on this point: Dives is what we in the blogerati biz call a punk with an over-inflated sense of his own importance. Of broader significance to you, dear gamer, is this: said punk is completely irrelevant in the context of games and gaming. 6 months from now he will simply be a false Google hit with a penchant for perturbing Scuba enthusiasts. If he's lucky he'll get a Wikipedia mention. Oh, and bragging rights on a very forgettable Kotaku interview.
What I'm trying to verbalize, dear reader, is that the man is apropos of nothing beyond a Skype recording that's really only funny because of the accompanying flash animation. (NSFW) The "Minus 50 DKP" cry which currently assails us all within our guild and group communications is a passing fancy, an out-of-tune whistle on the wind destined none too soon for oblivion.
Please Kotaku, I implore you. Bring to me the head of the logic behind such an underwhelming utilization of existence. I know the week after E3 is generally slow, but seriously. This is what you went with? An IM with a guy with a hangover? Lest you contest my erstwhile assertions, allow me to share a few select quotes from the interview:
I got pissed off at work so I downed half a liter or so of vodka.
Meh. Welcome to my lunch break.
I have visited most countries in Europe, including having intercourse with girls from most countries in Europe. It was a project of mine at one point.
Everyone needs a hobby, I suppose. Go you.
Thing is I'm an educated person but I use the education sparingly.
You don't say.
Don't get me wrong. I care less that Dives is an empty-headed bimbo, and more that Kotaku feels it necessary to give him air time in which to spew absolutely nothing interesting beyond the fact that he can cause you to regret the irretrievable minutes you squandered reading his interview, in 3 different languages.
What have we all learned from Kotaku's little lesson in paint huffing? Apparently it is that to score an interview with Kotaku you need the winning personality of a Tourettes-inflicted Matthew Lesko, coupled with the nurturing qualities of a Sony customer support rep. Oh, and the fashion sense of the 70's. Someone kindly remind Dives to remove his City of Heroes belt when he's done LARP'ing.
May 22nd, 2006 at 9:34 am
“Things are never so bad they can't be made worse…” …by bad interviews.
May 22nd, 2006 at 9:53 am
“Welcome to my lunch break.”
Erm… but you're American? It's a well documented fact that Americans can't hold their drink and that drinking at lunch is frowned upon.
May 22nd, 2006 at 1:46 pm
you will prob delete this but o well
sad that you always have to pick on wow players. i notice you never pick on daoc players or whatever other carebear game you play. always you pick on the wow players tho. diver is a funny guy, funnyer than you even on your best day. but no he plays wow and almighty amber night cant let a wow player be funny. just chill
May 22nd, 2006 at 2:31 pm
Erm, if he's so irrelevant, how did he get you to waste an entire blog entry on him? Kotaku only cares how many hits he brings, and your underhanded promotion may help make him a regular feature..
May 22nd, 2006 at 3:13 pm
Actually, I don't think that interview is a waste of ink. I remember back in the late 80s, when gang violence made top headlines in LA, a few intrepid journalist would go and interview gang members or leaders. The resulting interview was far from an academic discourse or grandly insightful. However, it was always thought-provoking as I would engage in a psychological and socio-economic evaluation of what caused these guys to be this way.
I'm going to give Kotaku the benefit of the doubt here and not assume they did this because it catered to the fanboys of WoW but rather to the mainstream gamer population that doesn't know about these guys. Sure, this guy is probably worthless in general society but the fact that in WoW he's a leader figure is indicative of something that should be explored further. To check the health of something, you sometimes have to poke around at the crap that comes out of it.
May 22nd, 2006 at 4:48 pm
I agree with you that the interview was a bizarre and fairly pointless choice of column inches, however, I would never expect anything else from Kotaku. Indeed, I actually thought it was one of the most interesting and entertaining entries I'd ever read from that site. I'm used to being genuinely pained when I read Kotaku, wincing at the asinine subjectivism and opinionated drivel they usually publish. And I use the word “publish” very lightly by the way, because the last thing I consider Kotaku to be is a respectable journalism site that should vet its entries, which is presumably what you view them as judging by your post. I never really did understand why people viewed them as anything other than lowest common denominator pandering.
May 23rd, 2006 at 12:09 am
Hey, you have detractors now! You've arrived!
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:00 am
Amber, you have never been more blinded by insipid shit during your adventures in blogerati.
I’m on the same wave-length as Dom. The piece was one of the more enthralling reads I have viewed on Kotaku as of late, albeit in the fucked up sense. As for Dives, he is a mouth breathing douchebag, he is not a comedic genius, and I’m not surprised by his fame for being hilariously retarded considering the echelon of inept worshippers like Ax who gravitate and live for a similar mentality.
Kotaku tends to be an annoying e-zine cock stroking rag for the likes of Reggie and Cliffy B, not too mention the majority of their actual news content is horrendous. I used to enjoy my daily visit to Kotaku, but when more contributors jumped onboard to keep up with demand the content drastically shifted to quantity over quality and my brain cells vaporize every time I check back in.
Dives’ belt would go well with your yellow poncho of justice.
May 24th, 2006 at 6:39 am
I just thought I'd point out, he only claims “intercourse” and doesn't specify what kind. That could be talking, and is probably accurate.