Nerf Snugglezerkers
Big blowout over on the official Hello Kitty Island Adventures forums. That’s right, they broke crafting again.
Before I wade too far into this festering piece of drama, let me just say up front: I understood why they had to nerf Cuddlies. Cuddlies were way too cuddly, and I think most reasonable players knew it. In RvR they were basically an “I win” button for your team. Huggy-wuggys were a little more controversial, but I think overall the devs balanced it well. Cutsey-wootsies, on the other hand…well, whatever fucking r-tard designer made the decision to basically gut the entire Saucer Eyes spec line, well I just have to ask: what fucking short bus did you step off this morning, and are you sure your crack whore mom didn’t pin the wrong goddamned note to your shirt?”
Anyway, I digress.
Here’s the problem as I see it. Let’s look at Tier 1 Head Ribbons. That recipe costs 10 gold, and 50 silver in materials to make. Plus another 150 gold in grinding just so you can make pristines with any kind of regularity. And by regularity I mean almost the fuck never. But you have to do it anyway because players won’t buy anything less than pristine. That means your non-pristines have to be sold back to the merchants at a huge loss. See where I’m going with this? Yeah, it’s a goddamned money-losing grind to be a crafter in this game now. Try outfitting your guild for a Badtz-Maru raid on those kinds of economies of fucking scale.
Oh and in case you haven’t read the latest patch notes, take a look at the Plush Battleaxe of the Bloodreaver that Tenorikuma drops now. How in the fuck is my weaponcrafter supposed to compete with that? Thanks Sanrio for basically dropping the bottom out of the Plush Battleaxe market. And it won’t be long before every single Snugglezerker has 2 of ‘em. Fucking Snugglezerkers, they get everything handed to ‘em.
But oh, they lowered the price of raw materials, how fan-fucking-tastic was it of them to do that? Yeah, whatever. What about all those components I already bought at the higher price? Am I going to be compensated for that? No, I didn’t think so.
I call bullshit. The lazy-ass devs don’t care about the players, and probably just sit around all day playing solitaire.
This game sucks, and it’s sucked since the very first day. If I didn’t have so much time invested in my main and 6 alts, I’d quit.
October 10th, 2006 at 8:16 am
You’re too dangerous to be allowed a keyboard.
Just imagine all the helpless little hello kitty searches ending up here and get confronted with that second paragraph. Think of the children! Who will protect the children?!?
October 10th, 2006 at 8:43 am
Son, we live in a world that has MMOs, and those MMOs have to be guarded by chicks with blogs. Whose gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Bughunter? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for the children, and you curse the bloggers. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That the children's corruption, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that blog, you need me on that blog. We use words like honor, code, loyalty, typos. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a
riflekeyboard, and post a blog entry.(With apologies to Colonel Jessep, and damn I'd make a scary Marine!
)
October 10th, 2006 at 9:22 am
beautifully done Amber, hats off to you!
October 10th, 2006 at 9:29 am
Thank you Jack Nicholson for causing me to hear that recited [read: mangled] no less than twice daily for four years.
Thank you Amber for that sordid twist on an unburiable memory.
Grotesque and incomprehensible indeed.
*sigh*
October 10th, 2006 at 10:45 am
My job is to make sure you do your job. I’m special counsel for Children’s Affairs, so my jurisdiction’s pretty much in your face. Read the letters. You’re not under any obligation, but I’d appreciate a report when you get finished corrupting innocents.
Apologies to Demi and the readers of this blog (not up to Amber quality, but the best I can do).
October 10th, 2006 at 10:49 am
The devs have known that Left Snuggleclaw skill is using a 2x modifier for a year. This would take 5 minutes to fix and they’ve done nothing about it, but yet they have all day to screw with crafting. God damn Snugglezerkers are ruining this game.
October 10th, 2006 at 11:09 am
SZ's are not the problem, and I should know. My main is WTFUnholy spec'd and I was in the beta. Snugglezerkers are a hard class to play esp duel wield. No other class in the game has to worry about managing insta-mez, heal over time, pets, nukes, stuns, back-stabs, buffs, de-buffs, and aoe dot. Our unlimited mana pool just means our group expects us to do more. Its hard work being a good Snugglezerker and all you people complaining just need to l2p your class. Oh and I just got my second Plush Battleaxe of the Bloodreaver from Ebay and man is it sweet!
October 10th, 2006 at 2:52 pm
“But I don’t want to go among mad people.” Amber remarked.
“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat: “we’re all mad here.”
October 10th, 2006 at 3:25 pm
Ha! Probably the highest compliment I’ve ever been paid! (Of course, I have to be the American McGee version…)
October 11th, 2006 at 4:37 am
It’s threads like this that keep me coming back to this blog, even if I don’t have a danny what the hell is going on!
October 11th, 2006 at 4:54 am
Were I actually in the presense of someone who managed to pull of an empassioned, perfectly recited, bitingly sarcastic and insightful mangled quote like that, I’d have to respond to the silence that would have surely followed it… with a slow clap…
*clap*
*clap*
*clap*
… and it would have turned into a most glorious roar of applause.
October 11th, 2006 at 6:22 am
I’ve had that game loaded on at least one machine since its release. When it first came out, myself and three others chipped in for a *blisteringly* fast ATI Rage 128. We’d trade off who got to play while the others looked on. Good times!
October 11th, 2006 at 2:40 pm
Where is the link to this game? I can’t find it anywhere.
October 11th, 2006 at 3:08 pm
Oh hon. There is no game. Just me being a baaaaad person. Sorry. :\
October 11th, 2006 at 5:26 pm
Dammit! Wikipedia has claimed the top spot when searching for Hello Kitty Island Adventures!
Commence opperation Google Bomb.
October 11th, 2006 at 8:28 pm
Quoted for great justice!
October 12th, 2006 at 12:31 pm
Everyone knows Cutsey-wootsies were overpowered. If you speced Kootchi-kootchi-koo and Chin-chuck right nothing could ever get past that pink fluffy fog and all the circling hearts it generated. Just because some lame noobs don’t know how to spec their toon and whine about not being able to solo effectively, you still can’t let the vast majority of CWs get away with being invulnerable. I had a friend who could solo multiple purple crabbies in Gumdrop Mines with no downtime.
October 13th, 2006 at 6:41 am
This entire thread needs to be quoted, for great justice!
Somebody set up us the Snugglezerkers!
The sad part is, I’ve participated in discussions like these that weren’t delicious parodies, rather sinisterly intense.
October 17th, 2006 at 1:02 pm
Posting as a developer:
Snugglezerkers are working as intended.
(And posting way after the fact, just like a real dev!
October 17th, 2006 at 2:41 pm
Ha!
Of course I’m just going to keep /appeal’ing it…
October 20th, 2006 at 6:23 am
[...] Amber Night blurts out probably the single best mangling of Colonel Jessep ever. [...]
October 27th, 2006 at 11:40 pm
I fully concur, this needs to be placed in the Smithsonian and recited by our children in Kindergarten. Had me in tears reading the replies. Nice work to everyone involved.