Boys Only Club
A lot of people are upset about the Nihilum Guild’s decision to exclude females. Me? I think it’s fabulous.
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From the WoW Insider:
Top EU guild Nihilum is recruiting a few serious Horde raiders on Magtheridon (EU). And not that I play on the EU side of things, but if I did, I wouldn’t be welcome to apply. Why? According to GM Kungen, there are a lot of reasons they don’t recruit females, but the one he highlights is the need for recruits to have a “high ‘abuse tolerance.’” And a bit later in the thread, poster Awake adds that female applicants are avoided because of drama.
Of course, this sent me into dizzying fits of feminist fury, and I knew what I had to do. It was time to send in the Amber Night Megalomedia crack investigative team to get the real inside scoop. Many Hobbit Burglars died for this information, but we were able to get our hands on the Nihilum Guild Application form. In the interests of press freedom, it’s reproduced in its entirety below.
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NAME:__________________________________
SEX: [ ] MALE
YOUR CHARACTERS NAMES (ALL OF THEM ON ALL SERVERS): ___________
ARE ANY OF YOUR CHARACTERS GIRLS? IF YES, WHY? _____________
ARE YOU A GIRL? [ ] NO [ ] YES. (IF “YES” GODDAMIT WERE YOU NOT PAYING ATTENTION? PLEASE YOU MUST IMMEDIATELY STOP APPLYING RIGHT NOW!
DO YOU SUFFER FROM ANY OF THE FOLLOWING CONDITIONS?
___ Desire to cause drama
___ Inability to tolerate abuse
___ Monthly Vaginal Bleeding
DO YOU LIKE GLADIATOR MOVIES? [ ] NO [ ] YES.
BRAD PITT. [ ] WOULD [ ] WOULDN’T. If “WOULDN’T” PLEASE EXPLAIN. ____________
WE ARE A RAIDING GUILD, BUT ALSO LIKE TO HAVE FUN. PLEASE DESCRIBE YOUR BEST ROLE PLAYING EXPERIENCE INVOLVING EITHER A RUSTY TROMBONE OR A DIRTY SANCHEZ. ____________________________________________________
ON A SCALE OF 1-10 HOW WOULD YOU RATE YOUR RAIDING SKILLS? 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
ON A SCALE OF 1-10 HOW WOULD YOU RATE YOUR CHER CD COLLECTION? 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
UG BOOTS ARE [ ] BEST WORN BEFORE LABOR DAY [ ] BEST WORN WITH SHORT SHORTS [ ] A COMPLETE FASHION DISASTER, HONEY.
YOU SEEM TENSE. HOW ABOUT A BACK RUB? [ ] YES [ ] NO
SO THAT WE MAY BETTER EVALUATE HOW TO BEST INTEGRATE YOU INTO THE GUILD, PLEASE SELECT THE MOST APROPRIATE ANSWERS BELOW:
Sports: [ ] Pitching [ ] Catching
Relief: [ ] Standing Up [ ] Sitting Down
Music: [ ] Liza Minnelli [ ] Judy Garland
Personal Comfort: [ ] Thong [ ] G-String
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR GYNECOLOGIST? [ ] YES [ ] NO
THANK YOU FOR APPLYING TO THE NIHILUM GUILD!! WE WILL BE CONTACTING YOUR “TOP” WITH OUR DECISION.
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More breaking news as it happens.
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Females don’t cause drama… males who have never touched a real girl because they spend all their time raiding or watching the night elves dance cause drama.
That form was pretty funny. The Brad Pitt question was priceless.
Meh, no different than my EQ guild requiring everyone to be at least 18.
I dunno about that. Discriminating on the basis of age is an entirely different animal than discriminating on sex. Your guild wants to maintain a certain maturity level, or possibly not want to have to worry about the repercussions of having “adult” discussions around minors. That’s a perfectly acceptable reason for having an age restriction. But discriminating on gender is saying you can’t drink unless you have a penis.
What makes me angry tho is the question about contacting the applicant’s gynecologist. What goes on between men and our gynecologist is our own damn business.
Well, really it takes both to make the drama happen. Exclude one side or the other, and you’re unlikely to have to deal with it from either the men or women.
Think of it like this: when guys get together to do “guy things”, typically they don’t include girls, because adding girls changes the dynamic of the situation. Guys may not explain it like that. And it may not happen in every instance (some girls really do fit in like “one of the guys”). But in order to rule it out completely, some groups would rather just not worry about the unfortunate issue happening in the first place.
That’s especially common in groups with a drive to be “at the top”. Anything that distracts from the goal is a detriment to the goals of the organization.
I’m not saying that this is the reasoning in Nihilum’s case (although it probably is), but there are perfectly valid reasons that have nothing to do with sexism. Though there are examples of the other case as well, and no one seems to have a problem with them (yes, I know one of those is of dubious quality, but the other is not, and I don’t feel like looking up links of all the female gamer clans in existence to prove a point on a blog comment =) ). So where’s the issue?
-N
Actually, female clans are probably the most singled-out groups as targets of player hostility. (the link is just one example.)
Is it ironic that you went off on the guy who unleashed his fury on an all-female gamer group, and then you yourself unleash your fury on an all-male group?
Just sayin’. =)
The oppressed cannot oppress.
This post (unlike the Petrie post) is just satire. I can’t bring myself to be outraged by Nihilum, and so I have no fury to unleash. But if I were unleashing fury, it wouldn’t be because it’s an all male group, but because of their reasoning. (i.e. girls are the source of all guild drama, etc)
I actually like that Nihilum made their recruiting policies known. It lets players can make an informed decision when deciding whom to guild with. But I’m not above simple base ridicule, which is all this post is.
Girls have Cooties, ’nuff said!
Can I be in the guild if I have a penis but only use it at Mardi Gras and Purim? I mean for [deleted by NSA]. I pee with it every couple weeks.
Well, at least they’re honest (and kind funny) about it: They want to be able to use big fat jokes, curses, yells and whatnot without having some drama queen coming around and starting a fuss because of women rights, respect, etc.
Totally NOT my kind of guild but don’t see any problem with the concept, just as I completely understand 100% female guilds.
As for “The oppressed cannot oppress”, I totally go against that. Women “were” oppressed. It changed quite a lot and even if there are still things to be done, now it’s men’s turn to go under. After thousands of years of fixed male/female relations, some men now completely DON’T know how to treat females because the rules changed.
Are men allowed to talk? make contact? glance? laugh? wink? or even dump without being sexist, sued or whatnot? Who the heck knows anymore and it’s not going to get easier. Heck, even Rambos are Rambinas now
To be honest, I wouldn’t be surprised to see lots more matriarcal orientations in our western societies in the future as men are lost in how to react and are afraid to get sued or singled out. Then, as this gets worse, it’d be followed by a quite severe and muscled out “get back to your place, woman”, the oppressor becoming the oppressed and thus wanting to become the oppressor. I’m not sure it’d be for the good of things…or women.
I’m 100% for women rights and power but I’d say be careful on how you use (or abuse) your newly gained powers gals (with big powers comes…blabla), it’s a new and unknown thing for a lot of big bulky men out there and as you know, unknown scares some people
Oddly, the drama problems I generally have in guilds aren’t from the women…
Kemor the rules really haven’t changed. If you behave as a gentleman and always treat a woman as if she were a lady you will have very few dificulties with women even of a feminist persuasion. The problem starts when you don’t behave as a gentleman. Now women don’t feel constrained to act like your shit doesn’t stink.
Does this only exclude real females or can you have mangina toons in the guild?
I’m sorry Sweetmeat but the rules have changed.
Due mainly to my education (very mordern but 90% female familly), I’m quite a gentleman by today’s standards and I don’t have much problems in treating women, who deserve it, like ladies as you said and don’t have much problems either just telling some other women to just “shut the fuck up and get lost”.
I’m just me however and not everybody receive the same education and I think you can see almost everyday that some men have problems with some of the “new women” because they don’t behave like ladies, at all, which throws them off balance somewhat.
What you said, “women now don’t feel constrained to act like your shit doesn’t stink”, is very interesting. Can men act nowdays like women shit doesn’t stink? What happens if you do? Are you a sexist? I think not, but check this:
You’re in a bar and you see a man and a woman closeby.
Suddenly the woman starts raising her voice and shouting quite violently at the guy, calling him names, etc. Then she slaps him and leaves.
Now imagine the role reversed, the man starts yelling and calling her names then he stands up, slaps her and leaves.
Everybody’s reactions to these two scenes, nowdays, should be identical right? Well, in your guts, you’ll know that most people don’t react the same way and to me, that’s the problem though it’s not a problem: men and women are not equal nor identical and don’t need to be, you just need a balance of respect between the two but you cannot put a law on that it takes generations and generations to reach that.
That was meant to be said in the same tone one might say “Black people can’t be racist.”
I don’t mean to be offensive, but…
“CHER CD COLLECTION”, the “UG BOOTS ARE…” answers, “Sports: [ ] Pitching [ ] Catching”, and last but certainly not least “Music: [ ] Liza Minnelli [ ] Judy Garland”.
I can’t be the only one to pick up on this. Is this guild not only anti-female, but have some sort of cross-dresser issue as well?
If you’re going to see a cross-dresser, what’s the statistical chance of the “woman” be Cher, L. Minnelli, or Judy Garland? Let me say again…Judy Garland. What about the answers to the shoe question?
Pitching vs. Catching? I don’t need to explain that one do I?
I have a hard time believing this is a true application and not a joke.
Oh hon. I have a terrible confession…
lol, I shouldn’t post when I’m trying to take a quick break at work and haven’t had time to adequetly read everything.
I’ll just have to take a longer break next time.
Girls are a source of guild drama, period.
How many time has a lass suddenly said something on vent just to get the reply “PLEASE RAPE ME!!!”?
No girls, no undersexed kids get excited, it’s that simple.
Myself, I like drama, the more girls and undersexed kids, the merrier.
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