Outrageous Richard Bartle Quotes Over The Years
Last week, industry “shock jock” Richard Bartle declared he is only a job application away from “clos[ing] World of Warcraft [because he HATE HATE HATES World of Warcraft and everything it stands for!]“ Bartle, who was totally serious about shutting down the most successful video game of all time, is also rumored to be working in seclusion on a death ray at his secret skull-shaped island somewhere outside of Kent.
Predictably, the community was outraged1. It should come as no surprise really. Dr. Bartle (who is still alive) has a storied history of stirring up controversy wherever he goes. The crack Amber Night Megalomedia staff spent the weekend uncovering some of the more inflammatory quotes made by Dr. Richard Bartle over the years, and it’s worse than you thought.
 Richard Bartle, Undergraduate slacker, Essex University, November 1980 “I really only started writing games because of the ho’s. Since I wrote MUD, bitches be comin’ up to my crib all hours of the day and night. See, I’m not just a designer. I’m also a playa.” |
 Dr. Richard Bartle, Postgraduate slacker, April 1995 “This Warcraft game is a smashing good time, but if they ever turn it into an MMO I will unleash my hell fury. I bloody well shit you not.” |
 Dr. Richard Bartle, Ivory Towered Game Designer, September 2000 “Fantasy games are simply an extension of our own cultural realities. For example, Elves and humans represent white people, whereas orcs and women represent blacks.” |
 Dr. Richard Bartle, Contributing Editor, Tera Nova, June 2006 “It is a sad fact of human evolution that due to limited cranial capacity and poor linguistic skills, Australians are incapable of leading large raids. I guess what I’m really saying is that Australians are bloody stupid.” |
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1 About the shutting down WoW. Gamers are totally down with death rays.
July 23rd, 2007 at 6:42 am
That dude has some weight fluctuation issues. Good stuff
WARNING: The femenists are on their way.
July 23rd, 2007 at 6:57 am
WARNING: The femenists are on their way.
I would be more concerned about the Australians.
Dave (someone bloody well stole my cool internet name)
July 23rd, 2007 at 7:03 am
Oi, listen here lassie, us oz folk are not stupid.
For your xenophobic behaviour, I am banning you IP, from, from, well, from something.
July 23rd, 2007 at 7:11 am
Now I know you’re upset, but calling Richard Bartle “lassie” and “xenophobic” (wow 4 syllables, nicely done!) just isn’t going to help matters. =P =P
July 23rd, 2007 at 8:54 am
Kanthalos>WARNING: The femenists are on their way.
Dave>I would be more concerned about the Australians.
No, the Australians have further to come.
Richard
PS: It’s not a “skull-shaped island”, it’s a “skull-and-crossbones-shaped island”, and it’s not a “death ray”, it’s a “ray of instant death”. Get your facts right.
July 23rd, 2007 at 10:14 am
Good to see he’s got a sense of humor
July 23rd, 2007 at 11:15 am
So what’s the attack modifier on that “Ray of Instant Death”?
July 23rd, 2007 at 11:40 am
Amber Night Megalomedia regrets the mistake. The researcher in question has been sacked and shipped off to “Skull and Crossbones Island” to participate in your
test subjectintern program.July 23rd, 2007 at 2:36 pm
Maniac-X>So what’s the attack modifier on that “Ray of Instant Death”?
I won’t know until I’ve finished, I have another 4 points to go before I max out my Craft Weapon of Doom skill.
Richard
July 23rd, 2007 at 2:52 pm
$20 says that after you get those 4 points you’ll still have to farm reputation to get the recipe, and then run heroic instances to get the components to build it.
July 23rd, 2007 at 3:30 pm
It doesn’t really matter, since it’ll be nerfed in the next patch.
July 23rd, 2007 at 6:43 pm
Hey, I’m Australian, and I totally lead a raid once.
I mean, just because we wiped a few times, that wasn’t my fault. It was the healers not doing their jobs. Not to mention that stupid mage who was just so fucking desperate to go around pulling everything in sight rather than leaving it to the tank like I told him to.
Was all their fault. I was really good, though.
July 23rd, 2007 at 11:53 pm
VPellen: All the raid heard when you gave orders was “G’day mate”, “shrimp on tha barbie” and random quotes from the Crocodile Dundee movies.
July 24th, 2007 at 12:41 am
For what it’s worth, I sound more English than Australian.
July 24th, 2007 at 12:42 am
M Grey>$20 says that after you get those 4 points you’ll still have to farm reputation to get the recipe, and then run heroic instances to get the components to build it.
Aw man, I got the points but it turns out I need to wear the Dread Mage Hat I got as a quest reward at level 29 that I disenchanted 8 levels later.
Right now, I’m looking at a Ray of Instant Queasiness.
Richard
July 24th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
@Richard: two words — RMT.
July 24th, 2007 at 2:52 pm
Andy Havens>two words — RMT.
It’s BOP.
Richard
PS: And I see your fiendish advertiser’s mind at work, trying to make it look like you’re selling me a three-word phrase for the price of two words when actually all you’re giving me is a one-word acronym.
July 24th, 2007 at 3:34 pm
@Richard: No, sir. No, no, no. And when I say, “No,” I of course mean, “Well, kinda.”
RMT = “Reputationally eMpTy.” Right? Two words? Henh?
Actually, I belong to an organization called M.O.N.K.E.Y. Which stands for “People for the Incorrect Use of Acronyms.” Not trying to sell you anything… just world-domination from a different angle.
July 28th, 2007 at 9:33 am
[...] Outrageous Richard Bartle Quotes Over The Years [...]
July 29th, 2007 at 5:13 am
All right, that’s it. Australians, gather round. We’re going to show the rest of the world what a highly-trained, elite defence force that has been in combat can really do. Shout the battle cry: SHRIMPS ON THE BARBIIIEEEEEEEE!!!